Humble

Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.  James 4:10

 

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. 

Rather in humility value others above yourselves.  Philippians 2:3

 

Humble-- having a low estimate of one's self; modest; meek; submissive...

 

"I like your hair."  You did great!"  Keep it up."  You're very talented."  "That's impressive."

 

I don't know about you, but it's easy to let compliments go to a person's head.  We all like getting a good word from another person.  It's fun and you realize people really like you.  In reality, who doesn't like receiving a compliment?

 

No one.

 

Everybody has something (or things) they're good at.  I'm no exception.  However, lately I've been getting the sickening feeling that I've let way too many compliments go to my head.  I feel sorry that I've done that.

 

So, I apologize.

 

Too often I'd get a compliment, take it, and  stick it in my mental jar of nice things people said to me.  I'd puff my chest (not literally) and my level of pride would rise.  It didn't bother me much for a while.  People were just saying kind things after all.  I do the same.  But one Sunday it dawned on me.

 

We were eating dinner with some of our friends after church.  Somehow, and I really have no idea how, the conversation turned to writing books and wanting to be an author.  It surprised me a little as our friends looked directly at me and asked, "So you want to be an author?"  "Have you written anything good?"  "Can you write a book for me?"  etc....  Being the quiet one and now having the opportunity to speak, I jumped at it!  

 

Something inside of me lit up and I rattled on and on about my writing ability.  "Yes!  I want to be a published author some day.  I adore writing."  "I once entered a contest and was one of four winners.  There were only 90,000 kids who entered.  So, I think that's pretty good."  (I can see myself repeatedly bowing and saying weak "thank you's" as roses are tossed at my feet.)  "Oh, I don't know...what type of book would you want?"  etc.... 

 

I looked over to one friend in particular and saw something different in their face.  It was more of disappointment than being happy for me.  I kind of slinked away and the guilt cloud poured on me. 

 

I had not been humble. 

 

Instead I bragged.  Most of what I said was true, yes, but that didn't change the fact.  I hadn't handled myself correctly and it made me upset.

That conversation was really the eye opener.

 

I was invited to a writer's group thing and I was delighted to actually get to attend.  During the days before, I was worried about the part where the other writers would tell me how my work sounded.  I was scared that I would again get big headed and vacuum up the beautiful words.  Or get disheartened if they didn't like my work.  I tried to prepare myself, silly as it may sound.

 

And...  I don't think my head swelled much!  I took the compliments, that did in fact come, with a coolness about me.  I also took the suggestions and tips like a big girl.  See, my stories weren't/aren't perfect and in my life of writing (and whatever else I do) I will have to harden to the criticism.  There will always be that, so I'll get plenty of chances to practice. 

 

Throughout my life, I've been blessed with many compliments and I am thankful for them.  I guess verbal affection is what I like best.  Anyway, I need to stop expecting those smooth words.  I need to stop taking them like a spoiled girl.  I'm not perfect.  I don't do everything perfectly.  I don't need a compliment at every corner.  : )